These are the actual milestones that you won’t read about in the baby books. Have you ever noticed that baby books are filled with predictable milestones for you and your baby? First tooth, sleep through the night, return to pre-baby weight, first solid meal, first word … the sweet list of milestones goes on and on. This post contains affiliate links.
It’s fun and exciting, but let’s be real. There is a whole OTHER list of milestones that the baby books don’t tell you about. Here’s a realistic mum guide to milestones and a list of “novelties” you won’t find in baby books.
The first time you get pooped.
Yeah i went there. Or rather the baby. This is a major milestone in a new parent’s life. For some happy mothers and fathers, this happens only moments after they first see your precious cherub. Others of us have to wait a few years. But it comes whether you like it or not.
The first time you cry, when your baby cries
Any experienced parent will tell you to try to sleep while the baby is asleep. Well we all know that this is impossible, but what you may not know is that there will be a time when the baby will cry when you will cry. Maybe it’s the 57th middle of the night fed in a 6 hour stretch. Perhaps it will be the first time that you have tried the much discussed “cry it out” sleep method. Regardless of the reason, we all have those moments when we feel personally responsible for every sweet little baby tear or the times when exhaustion is completely overwhelming or hormones take over. Crying when your baby cries isn’t the most glorious milestone, but it’s okay mom. You will get through and still be a great mom despite your tears.
On the first day, all the other mothers seem to know what they are doing
There will come a time when you look at all of the other new moms around you and think they have it all together. Their babies always look adorable, they somehow manage to wear makeup, take a shower and not look like they got up all night with a teething child, and they don’t seem in the least stressed about all of the things that you can’t worry about. You may be wondering if something is wrong with you … I have a little mom secret for you though. You really don’t miss anything. We all just find out as we go. There will always be a mom who looks like she knows more than you, one she seems better to keep cool, or another who always has the answer to write about. But the truth is that while they excel in these areas, they most likely only give them wings in the areas that you rock. Neither of us have all the answers and you are doing a great job just like the rest of the mothers who also have no idea what they are doing.
The first tantrum
You may have been told that these start when you are two years old. No Untrue. While the actual “tantrums in toddlers” begin closer to 18 months, infants also have tantrums. The best part is that they aren’t even able to do basic communication, so you probably don’t even know why they’re causing tantrums. Funny times my friend, funny times.
The first time the baby throws a whole plate of food
This generally happens when she eats over a carpeted area, but tile and areas near white walls are also acceptable. Now I don’t speak a drop here and there. I’m referring to the day she has food in her hair, on the walls ALL in the carpet and when you think you’ve cleaned it all up, you’ll be more stuck in the fat buns on her neck and stuck between her legs and diaper. (Ps – when this happens, suction plates can help.)
The first time he finds out how to remove the diaper
Mothers, just pray that this will happen sometime during waking hours. You DO NOT want to see what happens when this glorious lunchtime milestone hits and your little one remove their FULL diaper and use its contents to repaint their crib. (This is an actual story that happened to an actual friend of mine. Just. No.)
You literally don’t get any sleep the first night
Everyone talks about getting less sleep when you have kids. What you aren’t always warned is that it’s not just snark. There will be a night (at least one) where you actually get zero minutes of sleep. There is not enough coffee in the world …
On the first day you realize that you are amazing
It didn’t come straight away for me, but for some time between the tears, the cleanups, the giggles, and the stress, I realized I was doing a good job. I hope you find this day quicker than me, because the truth is, being a bad mother is more difficult than being a good one. We will all make mistakes. There will always be a day or two that we’d like to repeat, and our kids won’t think we were perfect, but they’ll know we loved them, did our best, and too much about the little things have stressed.
Find beauty today, in the midst of a sticky, crazy, tearful beautiful milestone you face. You are a great mother.
In need of more encouragement today, read 10 things all good mothers have in common